I disagree with the commonly held belief that the inherent danger of being an English major is a tendency to post- and -ism things to metaphorical death. I mean, post-'s and -ism's aren't in themselves dangerous. Actually they're quite fun. You can attach and detach them at will, like breakaway lego pieces.
No, the danger in being an English major is to analyze things to death. Usually pointless things. Things seeking authentification, which draws in other English majors, or post-English majors who have gone on to become theorists, professors, etcetera. (Note how I cleverly included a 'post-'. I have learned well in my English major ways.) The whole point of this was to bring the blogpost to the subject of Canadian identity, but it was taking too long going the roundabout and witty way, and I have a paper due in 2 hours I have yet to start writing. Procrastination, another skill perfected through English major experience.
Anywho, to take another shortcut, I just slogged through an article about ethnicity and identity and the pitfalls of multiculturalism, etcetera, so on, so forth. (It was pretty readable, actually, and by Bissoondath.) So! Much was made of hyphenation of identity, which seemed to scream hybridization in altered form to me, but whatevs.
Arg. I hate exposition. It takes too long.
In short: I think Canadians would make excellent super secret spies. I mean, internationally speaking, as we seem to lack any kind of cohesive national identity, which would make our loyalty to "crown and country" kind of questionable. You know, since no one really pays attention to the crown and the existence of an actual country seems debatable. So! Due to our hyphenated state (for example, take your typical Chinese-Canadian, Indian-Canadian, Jamaican-Canadian, Japanese-Canadian) we, nationally, occupy an unspecified zone of hybridity (this wasn't actually Bissoondath's point: he argued for a possible casting aside of hyphens and embracing identity as 'Canadian' with no extra add ons, proving that he fails at post- and -ism speak and therefore also at being an English major, shame on him). Our hybrid status makes us exceptionally fluid on an international scale identity-wise; give any hyphenated Canadian a good reason to be loyal to any particular government/country/etc., and chances are, they will be entirely devoted. Or at least amused with the novel experience. And also, by retaining the overt (non) identity of Canadian, these individuals would be widely accepted on many social and political levels. Which, obviously, necessary for being a spy!
God, I make no sense. I try to prove my logic, my logic falls apart. I should just give up. I mean, I just know I should not go into why all mimes are ninja in disguise, and as all ninja are also spies, logically all spies are mimes.
....and that essay deadline appears to be creeping up on me. Ack! Many acks! Haha, man-yacks.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
The Canadians as spies stuff made convoluted sense--which is the best kind. But the mime-ninja-spy syllogism doesn't work.
It doesn't work? At all?!?!?!? Ack. And I thought I was onto something profound... I should have known not to trust my own brain. It's kinda full of holes.
If I were to take a leap, I would suppose you meant to say all mimes are spies, rather than all spies are mimes. It makes sense--and your profundity is preserved--if you set it up the first way:
1. All mimes are ninjas.
2. All ninjas are spies.
3. Therefore, all mimes are spies.
P.S. I apologize for my extreme geekiness which causes me to find fun in such things, but where can I exorcise this geekiness if not here?
Please, please, always fix my logic! My natural faculty of reasoning is inherently flawed, so any help you can offer is vastly appreciated.
Today's extreme geekiness = tomorrow's ruler of the world.
/squelch self deprecation, Petra.
Post a Comment